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Primrose Hill Community Association,

29 Hopkinson's Place

Fitzroy Rd

London

NW1 8TN

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I Have An Idea

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September 12, 2017

home made god

something told me 

that i was not beautiful 

unless my thighs did not touch. 

something told me

that i was not beautiful 

until i lived only on plants 

ignoring hunger pains

sunken cheekbones 

dead eyes. 

some thing told me 

that i was not beautiful 

unless my stomach was tight, 

spread over my bones like cheap spray paint. 

chipping off at the edges 

shrivelling at the sight of oil. 

donteatthat/donteatthat

until three days later

when the inside of my refrigerator looks like the aftermath of a hurricane.

diet pills and cheeto dust and self hate 

sliding down my throat and sinking into my bloodstream. 

my collarbones are not even 

thank my home made god for turtlenecks. 

my arms have too much extra skin. 

pray for winter, 

or at least that nobody asks why i’m sweating in a long-sleeved tee in the middle of July. 

something told me 

if i could fumble with a squishy belly in my bathroom mirror 

i did not belong in a bikini. 

something told me

the world was made for girls who can run six miles 

or have sk...

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February 10, 2020

February 12, 2017

November 21, 2016

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